It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
