She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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