We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
