So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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