bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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