So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
