butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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