How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
