we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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