i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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