Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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