This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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