Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize