i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
