i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
