thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
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