Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize