Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize