sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
