I'm lost and stupid without you.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize