Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
