I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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