Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize