P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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