it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
