I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
