More tranny stories later!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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