she takes plan B like it's going out of style
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
