oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
