I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
