Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
