Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Alive.
So much puke
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
