I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
