Buhtt sex?
Welp...herpes.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
