i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
