I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
