He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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