it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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