well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
