I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
