just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize