I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
