He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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