1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
