it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
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