What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
