I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
