I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
