I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wish I only lived at night.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
