you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
