easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
